The Ten Laws
These principles guide every member, every event, every interaction within Kink Sanctuary. They are not suggestions—they are the foundation upon which our community is built.
Consent is Sacred
Before anything else, there is consent. It is not a formality—it is the foundation. Ask. Listen. Respect the answer. Always.
Discretion is Absolute
What happens in the Sanctuary stays in the Sanctuary. You will never reveal another member's identity, presence, or activities. This is non-negotiable.
Respect All Boundaries
Every person's limits are their own. You are not here to push, persuade, or pressure. Accept boundaries as gifts of clarity.
Presence Over Performance
We do not perform for validation. We are present for connection. Authenticity is valued above appearance.
Community Over Competition
There is no hierarchy of desire, no competition for attention. We lift each other up. Success of one is success of all.
Growth Through Exploration
We are all learning. Curiosity is welcomed, judgment is not. Every member was once new. Guide with patience.
Safety is Shared
You are responsible not only for yourself but for the wellbeing of those around you. If you see something, say something.
Honor Your Word
Commitments matter. If you say you will attend, attend. If you agree to terms, uphold them. Reliability builds trust.
Leave No Trace
Our spaces are shared. Leave them as you found them—or better. This applies to physical spaces and emotional ones.
The Sanctuary Endures
We are temporary guests in something larger than ourselves. Act in ways that strengthen the community for those who come after.
“True liberation requires both discipline and desire. We gather not to escape who we are, but to become more fully ourselves.”
— Founding Manifesto, Berlin 2019
Code of Conduct
At Events
- ●Always ask before touching anyone
- ●No photography without explicit consent from all parties
- ●Respect safe words and signals immediately
- ●Report any concerns to event hosts discreetly
- ●Substance use must never impair your ability to consent or recognize others' boundaries
Online
- ●Do not share screenshots of member conversations
- ●Do not reveal member identities in outside forums
- ●Engage respectfully even in disagreement
- ●Report harassment to moderators immediately
In All Interactions
- ●Use members' preferred names and pronouns
- ●Do not pressure anyone into activities or connections
- ●Accept "no" without requiring explanation
- ●Maintain confidentiality about members' vanilla lives
- ●Represent the community with integrity in all spaces
Accountability
Our standards are meaningless without enforcement. Here is how we respond to violations.
All decisions are made by a committee and can be appealed within 30 days. Expelled members forfeit all fees without refund.
Aligned with Our Values?
If these principles resonate with you, we invite you to apply for membership.
Apply for Membership